AGANG Mamphele weds Polygamist husband, DA

It wasn’t long ago when South Africa’s political virgin, former activist, academic and now newlywed Mamphele Ramphele held the country at halt when she surprisingly gave birth to a political baby, AGANG. Although many were not sure of what to make of this sudden addition to our already chaotic political family, this babe-in-arms somehow proved to be of difference and erected much excitement to many citizens after Ramphele publicly announced that she will be contesting the upcoming 2014 elections. Professionals, Academics, Business Executives and Born Frees saw this as a salvation plan to their toil of indecisive political thoughts.  Like any fine-looking virgin, AGANG immediately became a new target with old bulls (COPE and ANC) drooling behind her for a moment away - but rumours of her getting married to any old party were shuttered by her famous words, “I am NOT a joiner but a change agent…”

 

TODAY, less than 12-months after this grand formation, we wake up to striking headlines; “Mamphele joins DA”. A moment of sheer silence and amazement for many South Africans, to some a reality of hope crumbling right infront of their eyes in wonder of when dear mama started being a ‘Joiner’.  “How could this be? How could she? Where does this leave us” are some of the unanswered questions roaming in many South African’s minds. The shocking revelation that Ramphele could have possibly lured many into a promise that will never materialise is difficult to digest.

Does this mean she knew along where her loyalties were but wanted to drag many with to her union of unholy matrimony? Is this what she meant when she said "The name of Agang SA party will be confirmed, modified or changed through the consultation process."?  It seems like Ramphele was the modern version of a walking messiah who spoke in conundrums and expected to be understood in whatever she said or referred to. The question of her naivety echoes even more after this sudden revelation. Where does this leave the abandoned new-born then?

The Democratic Alliance on the other side has a kept record of swallowing party structures, slip them in like a serpent, phase them out and clear their identity completely. First it was the Independent Democrats (ID) who in August 2010, neglected their political identity and moved in with Madam Hellen in the mighty DA mansion.

Following that were other political personas who found the idea of joining the DA ranks much appealing for reasons known to them only. Nosimo Balindlela who was also labelled a “political vulture”, in 2013, vacated her COPE office for benefits of comfort within the DA. Today, we witness the Ramphele+DA marriage. What could the DA be promising these prominent leaders for them to easily forsake all they stood for to be disciples of Sheperd Hellen? It is no doubt that Hellen is morethan just rosey chicks and abysmal dance moves; she has proven to be quite a charmer to these black mistresses .

This however can be viewed as a strategic acquisition for the DA to bolster its black support . Lindiwe Mazibuko, Nosimo Bhalindlela and Mamphele Ramphele are proof that the DA is desperate to swallow the black masses before elections and in the process remain  being the strongest opposition if not the ruling party post  2014 elections. The question of the possibility of such transformation remain dubious as the DA is currently running at a loose of supporters with in the Western Cape following the service delivery protests in 2013.

Like before, we remain in question of whether this marriage of convenience will survive. They say there can only be one bull in a kraal and evidently Ramphele is no submission lady or so we think.

Insights however continue to differ amongst citizens. To many the ANC reminds them of how Jacob Zuma built his luxury harem in iNkandla, with its swimming pool, helipad, electric fence for his herd of cattle and that bunker for him to hide with millions of taxpayer’s money, in the aftermath of his myriad failures in leadership. As much as they love the party, the idea of Zuma being a part of its leadership defeats their interest.

To some though, this is possibly a game changer. Another view could be- Within this alliance/ platform/ acquisition, lie all the right credentials that can actually appeal to a wide margin of people. It has a nice alignment, because they seem to all have goal congruence and as such have more in common than the people sitting within the ANC, which is believed to be a "broad church", which constantly devours itself from conference to conference because each grouping has a different agenda.

Furthermore, it’s quite possibly the first time we can say that a party is a "rainbow party". As you know the colours of the rainbow actually complement one another (as this grouping seems to do), and do not seek to overpower one over the other, or even repel. Another question though is whether   the "Federal Alliance" within the DA supports this with their wallets?

Amidst all the unanswered questions and confusion, personally I still believe that the time has come for all those with influence - in Education, Sport, Film & Radio, Business & Industry to come out - selflessly and very vocally - and stand firmly behind any party that embraces an idea of a new South Africa. This country desperately needs clear, decisive, intelligent, selfless leadership to ensure that the South Africa Mandela fought so hard for realises its potential and its people are given economic equality where each and every person can aspire to and acquire an education, the opportunity to work in a safe environment and to leave the world a better place for their children. All this is possible but it needs a mind-set change at the Ballot Box come elections. Each and every South African needs to think about what is best for the country and who will deliver it. The ANC government who has now been in power for 20 years OR a party brought together with the mind-set of changing the failures of this government, realising and delivering the opportunities that are tangible and within the reach of each and every ordinary South African.

Indeed this is a game changer, this turns the voting table into another direction of new possibilities and whatever the outcome is, as citizens we are the ultimate decision makers. We are the ones who put them in power; we are also the ones who remove them when they no longer serve us.

There is little that we can conclude on as we are still fumbling in election guesswork and nothing much. But as we move towards the great event, I would encourage every citizen to start engaging in matters affecting the future of our country. In taxes, buses, hospitals, schools, let’s create a national dialogue that will challenge convictions of those who are or to assume power. This is just the beginning of much ahead.

I hope you are ready!

The Unheard Voice of Umakhwapheni.

Sexual infidelies are one of many features contributing towards the dysfunctional structure of our society and demoralisation of the marriage-family institution as a whole. In a nutshell, one can reach a careless conclusion that almost all marriage or relationship failures, atleast 90%, are as a result of irresponsible sexual behaviour or adultery of one partner between the two. Yet nobody has ever bothered to hear the mistress’s side of the story. Over the summer holidays I was fortunate enough to come across a “brave side-chick” who in a way managed to unravel the unknown yet very much abhorred mystery behind transactional relationships.

 Umakhwapheni, Side-chick, Mistress, 250, Flex-lady, iNkazana, Cheque madam, Third-leg and so the list the goes on. We have branded them with names and have passionately lived to either hate or love them- they are that third unknown lady in that relationship or marriage who is always blamed for the male partner’s unfaithfulness yet she remains unknown in all her operations. It bothered me to realise that I, like many others have never heard this mysterious character’s side of the story. The Why, How, What and Wheres.

 On this Saturday evening, my opinion gets challenged oncemore as I meet with lady, Precious Mazibula, Age 25, Kwazulu-Natal born  (original identity changed to protect individual) who out of her own will decides to unpack the lifestyle of a side-chick and narrate her life journal to me of how she ended up in her imperilling life situation.

Precious is one of over a thousand hopefuls who flock into Johannesburg yearly in a quest for a better living. She left her poverty stricken home in Eskhawini; Kwazulu-Natal to pursue her Sound Engineering studies in the city of gold, where dreams are lived and opportunities limitless. In her second year of studies, her father, a farm-worker who was also a bread winner at home unfortunately passed away. This to Precious meant, she had to look for alternative funding to cover her tuition or else drop her studies and go back to be a liability to her almost 50 year old sickly mother who was now a widow and guardian to her 5-year old son.

After finding herself between the devil and the deep blue sea, she decided to use the little skill she had acquired by playing in local gigs around Jozi- this is where she met Nimrod aka Dj Ooze (original identity changed to protect individual) a renowned money maker who is known by the whole of South Africa and celebrated by many for being a success in the much male dominated Dj community.  “It all started with a one night stand. I was naïve I know but he was exactly what I needed at the time. I knew of many girls who wanted Nimrod and never had a chance. I saw an opportunity and I used it” said shameless Precious. This was the beginning of her ‘lights out’ life- that first night was a doorway to her anonymously becoming a part of the infamous DJ’s life who at the time was all over tabloids and gossip columns celebrating his newly wed wife. That to Precious meant absolutely nothing as she, according to her, knew her place and had no business interfering in Nimrod’s domestic affairs.

By now, our conversation was getting closer to the core and I had to be very sensitive in how I handled her, the trick was to assure her of my trust and make her as comfortable as possible. With that being achieved, she continued to divulge details of this private ‘love’ affair.  A rail of questions came to mind and I could not help but wonder how this affair benefited her financial ordeal. She then disclosed a huge sum of money that was apparently deposited to her account as a first of many tokens of ‘appreciation’ to follow for being ‘a good girl’. When asked how she reacted to this, she responded; “At first I was shocked, then I decided to keep calm because I had never told him of my situation. He just kept it coming. So who am I to stop a generous man?” (chuckles). It became clear to me that Precious had calculated her moves very well; she did have an idea of what she had gotten herself into and decided to enjoy the transactional side of it.

How can a supposedly well groomed KZN girl end up in this disgraceful situation? How dare you Precious! Didn’t she have other choices? Isn’t she ashamed of being a marriage wrecker? Does she have no shame? These are some of few selfish questions that were bubbling from my judgemental inner self but I had to quiet them and learn to contain myself as something authentic in this lady kept me longing for more. I set there as she unloaded details of many other nights and how she continued to live off the married Dj’s pocket. I couldn’t help but wonder though if she was aware of the possibility of her sharing this man with many other girls. To my surprise she knew that Nimrod didn’t belong to her and could leave her for another Precious any day, any time. Clearly, this young lady had sold her soul to the devil game and swallowed her conscience in the process.

I am not sure if you are aware that Precious wants nothing to do with Nimrod’s wife. She doesn’t want to end his marriage with the beloved wife. She also said nothing about wishing to wear the Mrs hat. No! Yet, society will blame her should this affair come to the public. Chances are she will be victimised and Nimrod will smooth talk his way to forgiveness. No one will know her story. She will be remembered as the immoral KZN young woman who destroyed what was once built in wonderful matrimony. No one is interested in her story.

I hope you are not under the impression that I am condoning neither Precious nor Nimrod’s lifestyle, this far my opinions don’t matter much. Statistics have proven though that within the human species, females dominate their male counterparts in numbers. Could this mean, females will at some point share a male companion? If not, how will this population imbalance be met then? I wondered in silence if dear Precious knew of other side-chicks who were also in the same game as her. Although she didn’t give much details as I could see from her body language that she was reaching her point of discomfort, in a way she did hint of how rapid this lifestyle is amongst many girls in Johannesburg. So, where are the madams then? Did Nimrod ever talk about his precious wife to dear Precious? Well, he did and this is what he had to say about his darling wife; “I love her. She is my wife but too dignified and less adventurous for my needs. There are things she wouldn’t agree to do. Things you would do with such pleasure [referring to Precious]…”.Could this then mean Nimrod jumped the infidelity line because the wife was incompetent in her position or did he just prefer variety? Wouldn’t it be unfair to blame all of this on Precious?  Would I be biased towards the wife if I said anyone would strive to satisfy his needs with a fat pay cheque waiting in the far end? What can one make of this situation?

Surprisingly,  when I questioned Precious if she was aware of how she has exposed herself to sexually transmitted diseases, she responded by saying, “Ofcourse I am aware of that… but who isn’t going to die? The only difference is that I might die of a disease whilst you might die of tragedy”. This to me was a veil removal moment. It was revealed at that very point how poverty and lack had driven this potential future leader to opening herself to a possibility of dying before her time just to put bread on her table. I couldn’t help but wonder how many girls in Johannesburg had chosen this path. It could be my sister, your niece or daughter. I shuddered as reality was in my door area- I then realised that much is happening in our society that we are completely ignorant to. I couldn’t help but put myself in her shoes and wonder if I could’ve been a better person facing the same situation. Could I? The truth of the matter is, there is always a choice. Precious also had a choice and each one would have led to different consequences. Perhaps you are thinking, she could have looked for a job. But have you realised how easy we say one must look for a job yet knowing how difficult it is to get a decent job in these recessionary times? I am neither supporting nor bashing Precious here but I am opening your mind to a whole lot of possibilities we never consider.

One thing I know for sure is that adultery or cheating are unjustifiable wrongs but how to draw a summary in this context remains a mystery to me.  Incase you are wondering what happens to Precious, well she continues living the unknown night life as she banks from the ‘generous’ man’s pocket and send money home to her mom and son. Granted an opportunity though, she would love to live a decent life and further her studies as she had initially planned.  But life gave her lemons and she made a recipe out of them. That Is her reality and a reality of many other woman who are living in shame because of how judgemental we have become as society, how we have turned a blind eye towards men like Nimrod in our communities or of how well accepted men infidelities are.

To the dear wife, I can’t help but worry about your state in this situation. It saddens me that you remain faithful yet so exposed at the same time.  Chances are you might never be aware of the life you have lived unknowingly. They say the two become one right? I also feel pity when you call the other woman, Precious, names because she, like you was pursued by your man. Can’t you see the pattern here? Can’t you see how ashamed she is beyond that brave smile and careless attitude? Wait, did you even pay attention to her?  It could be your sister of daughter for all I know and you would never know.  That short revealing dress and heavy make-up should tell you something about her broken self. Yes, she is a side-chick and I am not asking you to befriend her but before you go to her house and attach her, before you embarrass her in public, take a pause and ask yourself if you have considered paging her Chronicles because like you, she is a victim.

To all side-chicks living and enduring life out there because of your inescapable life conditions, sisters be strong but know this, there is always a way out. That choice to walk away is still there. It’s all up to you. In all you do, consider the consequences. It’s not me wishing you bad luck, it is just a life principle- every action has consequences, whether good or bad.

To my brothers, the Nimrods out there, I will not say much. As you continue to widen the circle, remember this; there will come a point where the circle is too wide for you to manage and within that will fall your daughter. Her reasons for tagging along will be different all together but because of your emotional absence, she will need affection from other men like you to fill that void. You choose.

To you reading, as I learn, I hope you also learn to look at each situation from all possible sides before drawing conclusions. Society has such double standards and it takes a special eyes to see right through it. I hope you get that special eye.

The jumbled mind-set of a Born-Free.

January 17th, roughly a few months before SA national elections take place, the majority of voters are still occupied with thoughts of uncertainty, antagonism and discontent with the current state of our country and by large, the administration of governance. As a 25-year old civilian and liberal I couldn’t care less about the infinite opinions towards our government and how ruthless the politics play ground has become. What petrifies me the most is what is viewed as the cynical and naïve mind-set of my peers that has oddly transformed them into critics of note towards the current government fiascos. Their qualified opinions are believed to have strangely alienated them from becoming active in socio-economic transformation and  blinded them from the much upfront reality of upcoming elections. Suprisingly though, none of the inventors of this notion have attempted to live for a moment in the exclusive world of born-frees.

Voluntarily, I took it upon me to engage with a couple of these youths who have effortlessly given up on the South African dream.  During some of the dialogues I hosted with natives from different walks of life, I was confronted with a loud alarming knockdown of how disinterested and disappointed the youth of this country is in our government. To them an answer to the ‘What Is going to Change?’ question remains concealed within some of many answers  our government has failed to provide.  The core of their reasoning is how they have been practically excluded by government which then according to them justifies their offhand attitude towards a leadership that neglects their views and voices. Having said all, what unplugged me now and again from the heat of these dialogues was how prepared they were not to cast their vote at all. Bluntly, they couldn’t careless who wins and who doesn’t- to them it’s another event in a new year and nothing beyond that. How the result of these elections is going to affect them is none of their concerns.

 This led me to a fetter of endless questions about government in conjunction with the views of these capable future leaders. Somehow I zoned into memory lane and thought of the youths of generations before me who in their collective sacrificed the very essence of their being towards a struggle that aimed at liberating the youth of my time.  The cries of Steve Biko and how if alive, would stiffen in disbelief of how soon we have forgotten and seem to have thrown the towel in silence echoed in my mind. I questioned myself and in my imaginative wondered if the future will really be a better place than today. I couldn’t hold together the groan in my voice and the puzzle in my mind- to me being in my youth today is far more than a privilege, it is a blessing, it is a dream come true to the one freedom of a black child seemed like a dreamlike possibility, and it is an achievement to the one whose goal was to seek equality and freedom for a black child of my time. To think that TV Soaps, fashion trends and gossip columns make better sense to born frees than the current and future state of our country, let alone the details but the framework itself, numbs me. There seems to be no motivation at all for political activity.

 After my surreal moment with reality, I had to sober up and look at possibilities that could be contributing towards this sheer ignorance. It is no doubt that our government has done a remarkable work over the years in plastering transformation and clearing the wide footprints that were left by the ruthless monster that fed from bloodshed and oppression of anti-whites for centuries. We ought to first acknowledge and appreciate that before anything. However, it is also a saddening reality that in years closer to the 20-year celebration of our democracy, corruption has thriven and ignorance of many cries of our nation has prevailed.

Inkandla Fund is one of many scandals that have injected venom to our spanking new born baby- Democracy and untidily left a devastating after effect to many citizens. Amongst many of these scandalous episodes was the staggering delivery of textbooks where civilian’s enquiries were silenced with a dark tape of ‘no account’. Following that, the NYDA also took a share of publicity with an ordeal  that surrounded mismanagement of funds whereas prior to that our space was unexpectedly invaded by visitors, the Guptas and even then, nobody bothered to account- it was all  his and hers till silence.

 Eventhough these episodes might have been a result of poor leadership by a few individuals, to ordinary citizens who by the way  voted in this government, it seemed like a deliberate chain of negligence by the ANC.  In as much some might argue and say the ANC is an organisation not an individual, the reality is those individuals are decision makers and hold directive of where this nation is heading. The ignorance and insult of our intelligence by the government whilst attempting to give account for these happenings left many thoughtful of the idea of voting-in an alternative government. It all seems like we are told what is assumed by whoever plays the guitar to be proper information for the public and not the truth. One would swear that our government lives by the ‘Feed Them Lies Till They Drop’ policy. This whole catastrophe, defiled the initial purpose of our; ‘The People Shall Govern’ constitutionally driven democracy. It shouldn’t have come to this, we shouldn’t be talking like this at all, not now, our darling Democracy is far too young for all this but sadly we have arrived.

Frankly, the born frees have been exposed to the dirty laundry of their fathers, who themselves couldn’t care any less. Yes, this Nkandla and Gupta series seemed quite hilarious at some point and we all vented our frustrations on social platforms and communities of engagement but at the end of it all, each one would go back to their individual nest and be consumed by the perturbing thoughts of what tomorrow has in store. Could be it blacks have lost confidence in their own government, the very government they cheered with praises in 1994? Could it be that the beloved ANC our fore-fathers dearly lived and died for has turned against us? What is to make of this?

 The past year was not only flared by scandalous episodes, the nation also saw a couple of political surprises. First, it was the formation of AGANG as led by former activist and academic Mamphele Ramphele who put almost everything at halt with her ‘gangnam style’ announcement of forming a new party  , following that was the controversial birth of EFF by former ANCYL President  who had since been dismissed from the orgisation, Julius Malema. The reaction of the majority of South Africans left much to be desired though. The reception that these parties were given by citizens was a clear indication that the notion of considering an alternative government was sinking in faster than we assumed. Aside from these formations were usual oppositions to the ANC;  COPE and DA who also in their unique way were making their presence sensed. The  possibility that the ANC could be losing supporters is just indigestible.

 Ironically, none of these parties truly considered the stance of born frees in this country. It seems like politicians are ignorant to the fact that a large number of our youngsters will be voting for the very first time this year (in a case where they choose to vote), but somehow that doesn’t seem to tip priority to neither of these parties.

 Although some might disapprove, I too consider myself a bor- free. I started schooling in the new dispensation of  democracy and was never in any direct way subjected to racial laws. The prophesy of doom by those in power today about the reckless and irresponsible leaders  we are going to be in our time can be sequenced with the shaky current state of our leadership. It might or might not come to pass but the unforgettable break outs of the present will indeed affect the future. These Nkandla and Gupta gates will be sins these born frees will have to account for. This daily suffering rand that seems not to bother anyone will be upon the shoulders of the future leadership. Yes, born frees do not seem interested, because corruption and lies do not spell interest at all.

 South Africa is currently tackling endless socio-economic challenges due to decisions that were made centuries and decades ago. The ignorance then by those in power today on the long lasting effects of decisions they make today worries the bottom off these born frees. The questions that quarrel their mind space are; who is going to take over and do what? What will be my role in the then government and what is being done presently to motivate my non-existent political participation?

 The damning  reality though is, if these born frees, who by great opportunity would be casting their votes for the very first time this year decide not to vote, the badge of few political leaders or none whatsoever for the so near  future will be more visible than yesterday. Government needs to consider a more active and relevant training ground that will inspire these youths to spiral political transformation in this country, but again, how is that even possible in a government with youth leagues that hardly interact nor strike relevance to the BBM youth of today? How will then these two powers reach synergy if they come from such extreme schools of thought? Who will teach who and how? The little interaction that seems to take place in June 16 only is not enough to inspire new thought in one’s mind. What will our children’s children live to tell? The story of a hard achieved democracy that landed in the hands of self-absorbed leaders or will they pride themselves of a nation that passed a baton of good governance and exemplary leadership to generations after them? What will be told?

 With the little of time that is left, I do hope that the popular saying that the future of this generation is in its own hands can really hit surface and challenge new thought to our leaders. Lest the prophecy of doom manifests itself.

Are you LIVING or EXISTING?

“Are you Living or Existing…” this line was extracted from one of my all-time favourite movies “A Family that Preys”.  Although this is just a line from another movie as many might think, to me it carries so much sense and in its being inspired me to scribble down the following words.

Of many things that keep me awake at night, the question of whether I will die having fulfilled my purpose and tapped into my destiny tortures me day in and out. Over the past 25-years my life, I have learned that life has no guarantees and that every day is a countdown towards an unknown deadline- I have seen people I loved and cared about die right in front of my eyes without them living to fulfilment that which they were destined to be. I have watched the old die of sudden sickness, infants of unknown diseases and the youth paraded by tragedy- Frankly I have seen death rob the world of souls that were destined for nothing less than greatness, individuals who without doubt were going to be agents of change, influence and healing in this sickly society of ours but sadly they disappeared right in front of our eyes like mist. One of my favourite authors Myles Monroe states that thee richest place you’ll ever find on earth is the cemetery in your neighbourhood where lies unread  books, unsung songs, unheard  multi-billion business concepts and future leaders who were never afforded an opportunity to play their role. This in not so many words echoes the isiXhosa saying that “Isitya esihle asidleli” (the good die young).

With all that reality at our disposal, we somehow still live prolonged lives with postponed agendas as if we have indemnity of how long we are going to live. I am not against the idea of planning but I have a problem with sacrificing the privilege of the present for the unknown and unguaranteed tomorrow. Life is like travelling by bus to a destination known by the driver only. The beauty in this journey though is that in each city or town along the way, you are presented with an opportunity to enjoy yourself, have fun and experience new things. The choice to either enjoy yourself, dance and laugh or silently seat still till destination is all dependent on you.

So the daunting question of whether I am living or just existing deters me from living a life of obscure standards, mediocrity and regret. Whilst I am still here, I choose to be dancing, singing, laughing, influencing and learning on my way to my destination because at the end I will reach a day whether in my youthful glory or in my grey hair and wrinkled face where all that I am and all that makes what I am will shut down and release my soul to the next life- whether ready or not, whether wide awake or fast asleep.

The following are some but few of the people who were dear to me who reached their destination unexpectedly in the joyful days of their youth.

Thabang Mkhwanazi- Believed he was born to be an advocate. A young change maker dedicated to the betterment of his people whom I was privileged to meet in one of the seminars I attended a few years back. In 2013 he unfortunately was mugged, stabbed to death and found mutilated in his neighbourhood days later. He never lived to argue his first case.

Chriselda Williams- A young spirited dreamer who had ambitions to be a radio DJ in one of our national radio stations in South Africa. She was a loving soul who at 23-years was diagnosed with breast cancer- they said it was too late for chemotherapy. She died in her hospital bed five months after her diagnosis 14 April 2010. The airwaves never got a chance to release her sweet voice to the world.  Death silenced her.

Zimkhitha Mayathula- A dear friend to me who was also my classmate at university. She had dreams and ambitions to be a media practitioner like me and others. Like Chriselda  in 2009 she suffered death prematurely after being diagnosed with a rare disease I had never heard of, Lupus. She was ony 24-years. She also died fighting for her life just 2-months after her diagnosis.  She never made it to her first day in the news room.

Nick Govender- An activist and liberal whom I believed was going to a member of parliament someday. I met him during my debating years at university. Whenever I looked at him, I was challenged to be a better person. Did I tell you that in 2009 he was tragically killed whilst driving his new machine just four weeks before his wedding day? He never got a chance to see his beautiful bride walk down the aisle, remove her veil and kiss her rosy lips. He reached his destination before that day.

Nozibele Selela-Nzawumbi- My  dear mother, a career woman who had dreams to see me and my brother grow into remarkable and responsible men. I loved her with all that I am and connected with her in ways I fail to describe- she and I were once connected in her womb and that connection never faded. She died at 29-years in a tragic car accident in 1997. She never got a chance to look one more time, smile one more time, hold her children or even see me on my graduation day. Death decided to brand her Deceased.

Recenty, I was staggered after learning about the tragic death of a dear friend and visionary, Thembi Losi, she drowned whilst on holiday in Mozambique last summer. She was only 22-years old-a recent graduate who left everyone she came across with confidence that the future had capable leaders. In one of her interviews as published by Allan Gray she said; “I will pursue a Master’s Degree in Development and Economics in the United Kingdom or at the Paris School of Economics in France…”   As sad as it is, she never wrote the first line of her Masters dissertation. Death closed her chapter.  

All these remarkable men and woman died in the course of planning for the future. They all lived lives that left a trademark. Even though death surprised them and others who knew them, they had atleast started living. Most of them had already found their purpose and were marching towards dear destiny with it, some had just begun. They all had dreams of a lifetime but suffered violence and sickness in such a few years of their lives.

So while I approach the minute of the unknown I might as well start living and not just exist. When you live, everyday matters, every situation is a lesson and every event is an opportunity to love, smile learn, forgive, embrace, influence and laugh a little bit more.  I have no doubt that God has invested so much in me- so much that the world has not yet seen- I also have no doubt though that He also holds the stopwatch whether I have explored all those investments or not when the time comes it shall be so. His plans are undisputable and His ways mysterious.

Living is acknowledging that life is a privilege, not an entitlement- in that so, it can be taken any minute. You live responsibly and caringly. You cherish the idea of sharing your life with others, try new things and live in the moment.  Have you ever wished you could go sky diving, bungee jumping, Ice skating, Hiking or have worked hard and always wished you could travel the world? Have you ever wished you could just go to a foreign land where nobody knows you and cares about you and LIVE? I have. If so, chances are you haven’t yet lived yet, you have been existing all along.

When I die, I want to die empty and tired like Tata Nelson Mandela. I still want to live, I still want to discover all the treasures my creator has stored in me. As per my name, I want to be a living GIFT to the universe. I want to touch the world, blow kisses to Mother Nature and feel her fresh aroma around me. I want to see ten generations after me and see them set standards for generations after them. I want to be remembered, yes I do, not as a perfect man though but as a creature who knew how to live for a lifetime in a moment despite his imperfect state. I want to be remembered as a young man who tried, concurred, messed up, fell down yet stood up and continued with the journey. I refuse to just exist; every day to me is an opportunity to seize and empty myself to the world.

Whatever plans you have today, whatever future prospects, in whatever you occupy your space with, whatever mission or vision you choose to dedicate your life to, remember to please live for a while because life is nothing but a gift from above.

So once in a while you need to forget about losing your dignity, forget about your job title or class in society, forget all that you have or do not have. Do what makes you happy. Take a road trip to an unknown destination and be on the driving seat this time around, go to a foreign land and learn new ways to life, try new foods, new dances, speak  new languages, meet new love,  laugh till you drop and come back to your routine life- by then you would have atleast attempted to live and not just exist.

While you’re still contemplating about it, remember, tick-talk, tick-talk, tick-talk.

Now tell me, are you LIVING or just  EXISTING?

A trail to '204Me'...

Dear reader,

It’s been so long since we’ve zoned in this sacred space of ours and  it’s been ages since my last hear- to- heart piece on my undying passion to engage on matters that strike sense in our society. I’ve been struggling to think of a better come back to this page as there has been much to write about and little inspiration whatsoever to kick the drive in me. Having said much, 2014 has been branded  a year of limitless possibilities and I amongst many remain a hopeful for open doors to greatness this year- I hope you are also expectant.  Happy New Year!!!

A lot has transpired since my last upload.  Whilst we were gearing up for summer fun in 2013, the unexpected hit the world, the father of the nation and friend to the universe, Tata Nelson Rholihlahla Mandela passed on to be with his creator. It was a heart stroking and very devastating moment for many of us and the world at large, frankly a downing way to end the year. It is then that I witnessed diversification, love, unity and the strength that lies within my fellow South Africans. I had almost forgotten how compassionate and acclaiming we can be as a nation. The last time I had seen such an ambiance was when Madiba became President of SA in 1994. The embrace, ecstasy, optimism and comfort we shared amongst each other as a nation left much to be desired. It is then that I realised how I had taken for granted the struggle fought by those before me to afford a child of my time opportunities that were foreign in their era. For all I know, I could have been raised to believe that the colour of my skin disqualified me of better education, a better well-being and a right to freedom of speech, expression and association.

Following that was the staggering death of a father, friend and husband who also happened to be a close associate to the late Madiba, the legendary boxing champ, Baby Jake Matlala. As if we could swallow more of this bad news, the emotional paralysis from Tata’s passing grew even more. I had all sorts of questions and ‘why’ was the major.  I also realised that life was nothing but a gift and its due course depended on the giver not the receiver and as a receiver of this precious gift, I have to be grateful for every day granted and celebrate each moment in reverence to this privilege. A few hours before the cross over to the new year I learned about the passing of a dear friend and visionary, Thembi Losi, who died tragically in her time away in Mozambique- life proved its unfairness at this point. Then that was the end of my 2013, I rounded it up with Christmas and New Year’s celebrations in KZN and the Eastern Cape with family and friends.

Having relayed all that, 2014 is a brand new year and as per the custom we have all set goals and resolutions to change and improve ourselves and hopefully this year we shall carry and bring them into fulfillment before year-end.  During my break away in the Eastern Cape, I had a lot of time for self-reflection amidst the challenges and lessons I faced in 2013.The fresh serene in the nature bound EC has a way of refreshing my soul and creating space for new ideas and concepts in my mind. I am glad I had this time away from the buzz and endless rush of the city as I came back with enough strength and tenacity to make my dreams come true. 

I have enough determination to work twice as hard compared to the previous years. The funny thing though is that whenever I watch TV, the ‘204Me’ concept by SABC 1 somehow resonates hope and confirmation that this will be a year of breakthrough for me and many others who believe.  I have also come to an understanding that it will an extra-ordinary year which will bring a remarkable change in my life and provide me with opportunities to share more of my life with others. I hope  you are also wearing your running gear as you begin the race to greatness focusing in your own lane in this year.

Short and brief, consider this to be your first 2014 read with many to follow and I can assure you that this blog has much in store for you this year.

Oncemore, as you receive your first dose of Signed, Sealed ad Delivered this year, kindly recieve my well wishes to a victorious new year.

 Happy 204Me!!!